Excuses: "You should see what other kids are eating"

[HealthyMe2010]

My wife text messaged me from the mall: "mmm, New York Fries".

Knowing that this is what her and my son are eating for lunch, I replied that everything has its consequences, to which she replied "I guess I shouldn't tell you about the pop".

My kids rarely eat this way (I can't even remember the last time my kids have had a soft drink, at least not in my presence), but what hurt me was the excuse my wife gave next "Well you should see what other kids are eating".

Knowing that statistically the "other kids" are likely not healthy, can this really be used as an excuse to feed our kids junk food? I just don't understand.

I would look like a fool to justify smoking and drinking because "that's what other parents do", so how can one justify feeding junk food on the basis that other kids are doing it!

I know I'm not alone in this, but considering that I don't touch junk food, alcohol, tobacco, sugar or gum, I would hope that my influence would be stronger - I have ZERO chance against junk food and the addictive nature they have on kids.


How do other people deal with this kind of dilemma?

[CJJ]

WOW! I thought that was pretty rude and juvenile of your wife. She is an adult so can eat and drink what she wants but to act like a defiant child is just weird. She could have just eaten the fries and drank the pop and kept it to herself. Her 'excuse' of what the other kids are eating just boggles my mind. Great example for your son and don't think he didn't store away that whole incident to maybe use in the future.
Sorry, man. I'm just stunned.

[HealthyMe2010]

...don't think he didn't store away that whole incident to maybe use in the future.

This is my biggest worry. He's 6 now, but I can't imagine when he's 12 and starts to use that excuse himself: "Well my friends eat meat", "Well my friends are allowed to eat chocolate bars", etc... What REALLY confuses me is that when our kids go to birthday parties, she's offended that the person hosting is offering junk food at the party! Talk about being mixed up!

Having been through chronic illness myself and with the knowledge I've gained about nutrition and health over the years, I could never, in good conscious, give my kids food that will harm them.

[CJJ]

I would also be worried about your son using the 'excuse' in so many other situations - not just junk food!

[HealthyMe2010]

I would also be worried about your son using the 'excuse' in so many other situations - not just junk food!

I agree. The thing is, my wife is often "good" with this sort of thing, but then has a binge once in a while. The problem is that the binge doesn't affect only her, but the kids as well.

I can say that they must be learning something positive, because when I see how their friends act, I'm frightened to think about how they were raised. My daughter (9 years old) invited a friend to the movies, so my wife took them and this friend was BEGGING for popcorn, soft drinks and candies! Unbelievable!

[nicoles]

...don't think he didn't store away that whole incident to maybe use in the future.

This is my biggest worry. He's 6 now, but I can't imagine when he's 12 and starts to use that excuse himself: "Well my friends eat meat", "Well my friends are allowed to eat chocolate bars", etc...

I don't think it is any excuse, but since your wife was texting perhaps your son did not hear that particular rationalization? I mean, clearly they are eating fries and pop, but the excuse may still be outside his radar. FWIW

Having been through chronic illness myself and with the knowledge I've gained about nutrition and health over the years, I could never, in good conscious, give my kids food that will harm them.

I am right there with you on this.