I've had a rough week- 2 meals out that definitely weren't vegan. I had "allowed" myself a birthday cheat meal with a friend on Thursday. That was planned. Then Friday I had to go to a funeral which was followed by a meal- Cheesy lasagne, salad, and fruit. Plus desert. And... another desert. Sigh. Somehow, having eaten "off" on Thursday, made it very easy to just excuse myself on Friday. So, this is a good reminder how easily I fall, and it's back to the right path now...
Yesterday I did something crazy. I ran (well, mostly walked) a 5k. I had signed up for one in the spring which I ended up not able to do because of my surgery. I was totally bummed and had it in the back of my mind that I still wanted to do one this year. I have done one before, in the spring of 2009. It was totally fun, and I kept telling myself I'd do better next year. It was very motivating. So, yesterday, though everyone I asked refused to join me, I went. Most runners were with friends or family, so it was kind of lonesome, but I figured it was still a good thing for me to do, and I was going to have a good time. As I walked and jogged (well, more of a shuffle), I kept repeating Phil 3:14. I knew I wouldn't win any prizes, but that's the verse that I focused on. My prize is His high calling, and these days He's called me to get fit and present my body a living sacrifice.
So, how did I do? Well, keeping in mind that I'm 65+ pounds overweight, and had surgery 4 months ago, I guess I'm satisfied. The fact is... this is hard to admit... I was dead last. No one even near me but the police car that follows the race. It was very quiet being in last place. At least they hadn't put away the timing equipment when I finally got to the finish. Even though it had the potential to be pretty humiliating, I still had fun. There were several individual people along the route who cheered me on as I plodded by, and I was blessed by their kindness. One race monitor joked that since I was smiling, I was automatically disqualified. I shouldn't have been having so much fun!
At least I no longer care so much what others think. I guess that's a benefit of being over 50
When I was younger, that definitely would have kept me out of the race. The thought of what others thought and said, when they saw a sweaty obese woman shuffling along, holding up the end of the race, and coming in with a time about triple what the winners did, well.. those are the kinds of thoughts that would have caused me to say "there is NO WAY I'm going to do this". Now, people can say or think what they want. I figure I'd rather be in last place, than not in the race at all.
So, today I'm stiff and sore, and motivated again to exercise more regularly. And, I'm thankful that the Lord gave me the strength to do a 5k! Praise His name.
So, I'm praying that you all are having great adventures of your own on this journey, and pressing on toward the mark for the prize of the high call of God in Christ Jesus. Sometimes winning is a breath-taking finish with lots of crowds, cheers, and excitement. But, sometimes it's an out-of-breath determination to just quietly keep going even when you're all alone, and you know you're going to be last. Winners aren't always in first place. If we're in Christ, one way or another, we win.