What's a girl to do?

[ajhondrngal]

Sounds like you are doing great. I lost the sugar urge too. Except, that I still have honey in my tea in the morning and in my oatmeal or brown sugar in the oatmeal. But I don't eat deserts. The problem comes when I go to my In laws house and they make a cake for someone's birthday. What do you do then? They know we're on this diet and make fun of us all the time. Yet they say (except the mother) they want to go on it because they are all borderline type II diabetics. Do you not eat the BD cake or just do it that one day? It was my mother in laws 92nd BD. What IS a girl to do? What would you do? Every time we go there which is about every two months my brother in law makes a dessert and slices it up and plops it down. No one wants to hurt his feelings. I really don't want the extra pounds seriously. My husband is on the whole plant based diet too but he won't do anything that rocks the boat and so he complies so I'll be the only one not doing it.
Marieh9

Actually, right now I'd eat a small piece. I haven't tackled that too much yet. I do try to make it a small amount and very seldom. At home I make plant-based desserts for special occasions, but in social settings it can be hard.

[maggieleaps8]

I say if you don't want the cake, don't eat it! Doing what everyone else does results in looking and feeling like everyone else which seems to be fat and tired! However, when I have found myself in that situation I let them cut me a piece, then cut 2/3 of it off and chuck it (inconspicuously) and eat the remaining 3rd. Over time I imagine it will get easier and easier to say no, socially and psychologically but for now I totally agree in progress not perfection. A little cake every two months is better than cake and ice cream in the house all the time!

[maggieleaps8]

Ice cream can be so delicious....however I have found great vegan ice cream via my cousin who was vegan for years. While ice cream has never been one of my binge foods its nice to know if I ever crave some I COULD have a healthy alternative. I wish someone had told me 20 years ago I was freakin mildly lactose intolerant! Would have saved me years of being overweight, having stomach problems and serious nasal passage clogging. Now that I don't partake anymore all that is going away. The nose and stomach issues most noticeable (all gone except as previous poster said when I accidentally get some, or when I choose to be stupid and think 'oh there's only a little bit of dairy in here). Reading McDougalls site about dairy and how lots of people are intolerant and don't know it really sealed the deal for me. It's funny all these years I thought I was having normal, every day just part of being a human problems when really it was a mild food allergy. Now I only have myself to blame if I feel like crap.

Good for you for saying no all those times. If you blend up bananas and some berries really well with a little almond milk then freeze it that can be a great alternative to satisfying the sweet and cold cravings too!

[nayasmom]

Sounds like you are doing great. I lost the sugar urge too. Except, that I still have honey in my tea in the morning and in my oatmeal or brown sugar in the oatmeal. But I don't eat deserts. The problem comes when I go to my In laws house and they make a cake for someone's birthday. What do you do then? They know we're on this diet and make fun of us all the time. Yet they say (except the mother) they want to go on it because they are all borderline type II diabetics. Do you not eat the BD cake or just do it that one day? It was my mother in laws 92nd BD. What IS a girl to do? What would you do? Every time we go there which is about every two months my brother in law makes a dessert and slices it up and plops it down. No one wants to hurt his feelings. I really don't want the extra pounds seriously. My husband is on the whole plant based diet too but he won't do anything that rocks the boat and so he complies so I'll be the only one not doing it.
Marieh9

There are several words to describe what's going on with the sabotage efforts. "Bullying" comes to mind, as does "control by intimidation", and of course the all-purpose "co-dependence".
It is OKAY to be the only person at the table not indulging in stuff that will make you sick or otherwise doesn't give you a good return for the investment. It's just not worth it. If anyone tried that on me, I simply wouldn't be a guest at their home anymore. thankfully none of my friends or adopted family have ever tried to sneak crap by me or tried to belittle me into eating their food.
Standing your ground will cause you to be weak-willed and easily bullied, said NO ONE EVER.
Robyn