Frustration!!!!!

[vegan1mimi]

I'am totally frustrated!!! My big problem is when I stay on task and eating as I should, I will be losing and feeling real good about myself and then I'll start gaining, a pound here then a half pound there and I get discouraged...get down on myself ...then I don't think I'm eating wrong I really truly don't think I'am...Then I just want to throw my hands up in the air and say to heck with it and just eat WHATEVER!!! Cause honestly I'm just tired, tired of the rollercoaster and the disappointment. I have been fighting to just get into the 200's this past year. I keep a diary. I even check that I don't go over POINTS! yes I even count my points!!! (Like an idiot) . I don't even share with anybody that I'm trying or have lost weight (don't wanna jix it ya know what I mean?) sometimes I think I'm just losing my mind and that it is hopless Then I just want to go and binge. But I know that is not gonna solve anything and I don't. Anyway I'am so frustrated. Don't REALLY know what else to do...Maybe incorporating to many things together Just really want to have some results. Try to talk to DH about this and I get real emotional while I'm talking to him and he is sitting there listening with a look of (where did this come from expression)on his face. He doesn't understand. He can't he hasn't stuggled with obesity most of his life. Anyway I'm sure I have been a GREAT downer for everyone, but I really need some feed back, encouragement, even if its an atta girl...I gotta get rid of this weight.....I want to be healthy.

[Letha..]

Vegan1Mimi,
I’d like to suggest that you attempt to look at the situation in a more dispassionate light. Approach it like a scientist. Examine the facts. Develop a hypothesis. Develop a way to test your hypothesis. Record the results. Change the variables. Retest. Discover for yourself what will work for you in your life. You know if you eat nothing you will become very thin and then starve to death. Somewhere between there and what you are currently doing is the path you need to follow and I know you can find it.
Letha

[sksamboots]

Hi,

I understand your frustration. I have been overweight all my life. I have felt like your currently feeling many a times.

My suggestion is that you have to change your thinking about this all. You have to decide that no matter what you will not give in or binge. You also have to start looking at other things. I had to decide what was more important to me; weight loss or my health. I chose my health. So to me that means I'm going to stick to this plan no matter what the scale says because my health is so much more important. Weight loss is just a bonus. I also started to look at other numbers such as my blood pressure, cholesterol, my waist number (some doctor's only go by waist, women should have a 35 inch waist or less), also how my clothes were looking and how I felt. If I went by those other numbers i have found that I stick to this plan and don't binge. I find that when I focus on the scale that, that's when I get discouraged and give up. You really have to ask yourself, why are you doing this? For health or for weight loss? I hope it's health. If it's for health, another thing that I have done is given myself 2 or more years to get the weight off. Why you may ask? Because I didn't put this weight on overnight and I can't expect it to come off overnight. It's going to take time and effort. It's not easy but I can't expect magical things . You can do this. You have the tools. Just keep doing what you need to do. Maybe you could post a daily menu for us and the kind of exercise you are doing. I believe in you

[Kevtrane]

One thing I might suggest is that Joel Fuhrman lays out a 6 week plan in his book eat to live that in some ways is a little more restrictive then the McDougall MWL plan and in some ways less restrictive. I think that it may be a good way to shock the system when we get to a plateau or in a rut. Long term I think that Dr McDougall's plan is the only maintainable solution but the other plans do have their uses. In his book Eat To Live Fuhrman says that the average person loses 21 lbs on his 6 week plan.

If you decide to try this please let us know how it works out.

[merriweather]

On the McDougall stars page there are the videos, then there is a link to stories. One of the bottom one--I started there-- is about curing obesity. It is by Uncle Buck. Not sure if it lists his name on title.
Any way he really gives some good ideas on how to take charge of our lives.
He said He often tells people to give away , or at least put in someone elses charge, the scale. It is so tempting to Check. And we are so trained to check scales. But they can 1, be decieving, and 2 fluctuate.
Maybe you could check out his article, cause I really think he has walked the walk.

[MaryW]

First of all, don't give up! You are on the right track, you just have to find your groove.

How often do you weigh yourself? If you weigh all the time and get discouraged, I would recommend weighing only once per week or even once per month. I do weigh myself every day, because I am curious what my foods and activities do to my weight. And the scale is all over the place! But I only COUNT that number on weigh in day (which is Thursday). If you are the kind of person who gets a bit obsessive with weighing, don't weigh every day. Maybe you could get rid of the scale for a while and weigh yourself somewhere else, such as the gym or the doc's office. If you don't have a scale at home, you won't be tempted to hop on all the time and subsequently get discouraged.

If you are following MWL, review the points. Are you eating enough vegetables compared to your starches? Are you eating plenty of raw veggies? I've found the more raw veggies I eat, the more the weight comes off. Salads are important, but snacking on raw veggies through the day (baby carrots, pepper strips) is good too. Especially if you are replacing a starchy snack (like a potato) with the raw veggies.

Hope this helps! You can do it!

[MaryW]

Also check out this other related thread with lots of good ideas and support

http://drmcdougall.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=13243

[Sandra]

Vegan1mimi,

You are in the right place. Reading your frustration was much like looking in a mirror for me. I'm trying to start successfully myself, so I'm on the shaky side now, but I keep running back to these same people and it is encouraging. I KNOW people understand.

I also like the tickers with everyone's weight and progress. I am about 290 right now and when I see those who started around my weight, I KNOW they understand what I go through and how I feel.

Even though I know different in my head... you people who have only a few pounds to loose don't "speak" to me as much. Letha speaks to me very much because she started so high with so much to lose, yet she is the energizer bunny and just keeps going. I keep thinking that if I don't get MY show on the road, that Letha turtle is going to race right by me and leave me in the dust! LOL

The point is that even being frustrated you are looking for answers and you are asking and listening to the right people. You ARE addressing the problem and not denying it and that is a BIG start. That is the hardest step one there is. Now... go to step 2.

When my computer acts up and I don't know why or what to do, the first thing I always do it to turn it off.. then back on. 99% of the time it works great afterwards. Maybe I'm saying to just go back to the basics. Start again with the very basic McDougall.. and go on from there?? It can't be any worse.. right?

sandra

[MaryW]

Heh, I feel the same way, Sandra. If I don't keep my butt in gear, Letha is going to pass me! (but I will be very happy for her if she does! )

[Faith in DC]

Everyone's suggestion is great. As Letha said you have to be honest with yourself and analyze the situation. Maybe you are eating too much processed foods. Not enough veggies. So much plays into weight loss.

Along my journey, I have reminded myself, to not get upset unless I have been perfect for two weeks with no change. Guess what, it never happened. It's amazing how many items sneak into my mouth when I'm not paying attention. Then I wonder why am I up?

[MTeehan]

the ONLY thing that worked is to completely abandon everything EXCEPT MWL. I tried it with WW and I started eating a few 'points' of margarine. Before I knew it I was over 300 again. I even tried to do a 'McDouggieFast'. (the medifast diet using McDougall Right Foods cups. 4 cups and a McDougall sensible meal) It was a disaster! I realize everyone is different but my guess is that MWL will work exactly as Dr. John staes in the book if we follow it exactly as he prescribes.

[DianeR]

One's weight does jump around from day to day. For instance, the amount of sodium you've had affects water weight. Unlike others, when I'm in weight loss mode I weigh myself every day. BUT I only consider an average of a week's weights as an indication of what my weight is (that, and how my clothes fit). In the past, I might not see that I'm losing as I happen to weigh myself, but then I see that on average I have dropped 1/2 to 1 pound per week.

One thing you haven't mentioned is exercise. If I don't exercise, I don't lose (unless I've really restricted calories which I don't normally do -- I'm talking about when I'm sick and don't feel like eating). Exercise also makes you feel better.

People plateau when they are losing weight, too. I've gone weeks sometimes with no movement.

The suggestion of thinking of doing what you can to be healthier and healthier each day, and not concentrating on weight, is a useful one. Even if the scale hasn't moved, for each day of McD'ing you are getting healthier. That makes it worthwhile.

If slow weight loss bothers you, remember that if you lose too quickly, your skin will be saggier...

[vegan1mimi]

WOW!!!! All your suggestions are GREAT...As a matter of fact after I got off line and calmed down I started thinking about everything. Letha I started looking at what exactly was I doing. I went back and started reading my food diary. It has all the info on fat, fiber, sodium and the rest. And saw on several days that the fat was up and the sodium was up (this is my scientific view) then I started to have real serious self talk (kind self talk) being truthful to myself. and as sksamboots said I have to decide that no matter what, I will not give in or binge. I also have to start looking at other things. I have to decide what was more important to me; weight loss or my health. I choose my health. So to me that means I'm going to stick to it. EXACTLY!!! I was listening to Dr. Fuhrman on my MP3 player at work today and he said if one focuses on weight loss and not health they are doomed to fail....My focus has been on those numbers on the scale...I started to look at other numbers that I have filed away and hadn't looked at in a while. I found my lab tests from the past 4 years, my cholesterol has gone from 208 to 167!!! Booo YA!!! (feelin pretty good about that number) I realize too that I haven't been eating enough veggies and I have lost focus on my water intake. (see I told you I was going to be truthful) and I weigh myself everyday... that is better than what I use to do I use to weigh 2 and 3 times a day!!! I'm gonna do as you suggest Mary W and have a weigh in day and use that for my reference point. And No I haven't exercised in a while. my DH did purchase a recumbant stationary bike "step thru design" by NordicTrack. I got that because it was difficult to raise my leg over the middle bar on the bike. So I need to get in gear and start using it again.You know I cannot begin to tell you all how much this has ment to me to have you encourage me and talk to me the way you all have Your suggestions are great and were really needed. I have been needing contact with others who know and identify with what I'm going through! Thank you, Thank you, Thank you! God Bless everyone of you!!!

[janluvs2heel]

Man, does that ever sound familiar.

I have decided I need to eat this way to be healthy, period. I know the weight will come off but I need to take care of myself. The older you get, the harder it is to lose weight & I just turned 59. I am not going to lose 10 lbs a week, I might like to but it will be in my dreams.

I do know that I have no heartburn, which I did not have until I got into my mid 50's, I have much fewer aches & pains, I come home with much more energy & sleep better at night, doing this plan. I may not always be perfect, but I find if I focus on how I am feeling, the slow movement of the scale wont matter as much. Take one piece of clothing that is snug but you can still get on try it on once a week. Take note on how it fits each week.

I might suggest you try Mary's mini, for a week or 10 days. It might get you over the hump. Who knows why we get stuck on a certain # on the scale & can't seem to get past that? I know mine is 200. I have about 25 lbs to lose before I am there, but I know from experience, I get stuck there. Like I am afraid to go down below that #. I dont know.

So, keep plugging away. Everyone on this forum is so gracious, helpful, use that to your advantage. Just like you did, ask for help, guidance, whatever you need. You said your husband doesn't really get it, well, most of us here on this forum get it.

Good luck with your healthy journey.

[sksamboots]

vegan1mimi: I'm so happy , you made me smile. I'm hoping you will come over and start a journal soon, so I can learn more about you and support you in your journey to health